Author: Denis Wilhelm

No Place Like Home

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I’m in Mexico again! Another business trip to Mexico City. Another couple of plane rides. Another couple of nights in a hotel.

Don’t get me wrong – I’m not complaining. I really love traveling. And I’ll be seeing a customer whose company I truly enjoy. And I’m painfully aware of how many of my friends are unemployed or under-employed. So I am thankful for my job – even if it takes me away from home sometimes.

But tonight I just want to be home. I want to hear my wife tell me about her day. I want to fall asleep watching the local news – in English! I want to listen to my six-year old granddaughter tell me excitedly about her newest friend at school or hear my two-year old granddaughter tell me that she’s going to be going to school soon, too! I want to see my baby grandson smile his sweet smile (that I’m certain is just for me!). I’m a hopeless ‘homebody’.

I don’t know, maybe it’s the ‘holidays’ or the fact that our son is leaving for Korea next week for a year but right now I NEED TO BE HOME. I’m feeling that ‘ache’ for home that I sometimes get.

So here I am in Mexico City feeling way too sorry for myself AND guilty because so many others are separated from their loved ones – not for just a few days but for years or maybe for eternity.

I’m praying these next few days pass quickly and I’ll be back in that “loving embrace” of home soon. I also pray for all those who are yearning for home. May they find “home” in their hearts; in their memories; in their dreams.

This song always makes me a little sad, but sometimes a little sadness makes me happy (or maybe I’m just a little loco!)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lbSOLBMUvIE&feature=related

Peace,

Denis

O Come O Come Emmanuel

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 Nothing is as simple and profound as a God that loves us unconditionally.   In the midst of the modern Christmas frenzy Advent is a perfect time to remind ourselves of that awesome wonder.

Tomorrow Advent begins. And once again we prepare for the coming of Christ. Today I unpacked the Advent wreath and Deb bought new candles. For the next four Sundays we will light our candles and carry on our tradition of “keeping Advent”. This is that special time of year when we reflect on Jesus’ coming in history and His coming in our lives today and also His final coming. 

For the next four Sundays our Gospel readings will contain the messages of Advent – take care; be aware; prepare. And while we’re busy about “getting ready” for Christmas – the shopping, the parties, the gift giving, we’re being reminded to S L O W  down. We’re being reminded to “get ready” for something much more important than the latest toy or electronic gadget; something much more important than our favorite family recipe; something much more important than our parties or holiday celebrations.  We are preparing ourselves to meet (once again) our Savior who is ALWAYS with us and who will NEVER forsake us.

This evening we went to our parish to view “Scenes of The Nativity” – parishioners put their personal creches on display for all to enjoy.  Some of the Nativity sets are old, some are handmade, some very elegant, some disarmingly simple. All represent the Holy Family at the time of Jesus’ birth.  At the end of the exhibit is an opportunity to create a living Nativity – with costumes and ourselves playing the parts of angels, shepherds, wise men and of course Mary, Joseph and baby Jesus. 

This year my daughter was Mary; my son-in-law Joseph; and Noah was baby Jesus (he was a natural!).  Anna and her cousin Charlise were angels (adorable) and the rest of us were Wise Men – well Debbie was a Wise Woman I suppose. It was fun and the angels and baby Jesus were especially sweet – a nice family time.

Holy Family

Later while the girls were playing in the “Children’s Area” replete with Fisher-Price Nativity sets and arts-and-crafts tables I held Noah (Baby Jesus).  While holding in my arms he smiled at me and I couldn’t help but think about Jesus as a baby and how much Mary and Joseph must have loved him. 

At times it is amazing to me that God presented Himself to us an infant!  Not as a warrior or super hero or a King.  But an infant – helpless, completely dependent, and completely human.  And while I held Noah it all made perfect sense to me.  Someday when I’m much older and Noah is a grown man he will bring me comfort and help ease me into my final days.  The love that we share will transform us – as I grow old and weak; he will grow big and strong. Tonight I prayed that we will always be connected even as we inevitably change.  And if I’m truly blessed he will remember me fondly after I’m gone from this life and he will always know how much I loved him. 

Imagine then how much more God will love and care for each of us.  God who gave us His only Son that we might live.  God who changes us so that we might change the world. O come O come Emmanuel!

Jesus said to his disciples: “As it was in the days of Noah, so it will be at the coming of the Son of Man.  Matthew 24:37

Peace,

Denis

Give Thanks

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Every year as a nation Americans pause on the last Thursday of November to give thanks. For many of us this is really just a day to enjoy turkey, pumpkin pie and football. And for that I’m thankful, too. But this year I have so much more for which to be thankful. I’d like to thank God for all of my blessings. 

Here goes:

  • Thank you for my beautiful wife of 35 years who gives more than she ever receives (even though I try).
  • Thank you for my children who will always be my babies even though they are adults.
  • Thank you for my grandchildren – they are my greatest joy and hope for the future!
  • Thank you for my son-in-law who is not only another son but my friend and my brother in Christ.
  • Thank you for my siblings who help keep me grounded and remind me of the importance of family.
  • Thank you for my parents who are examples of married love and devotion.
  • Thank you for my in-laws, nieces and nephews, cousins, aunts and uncles and all other family members – you fill my life with love and kindness.
  • Thank you for my friends who have carried me many times when I have lost my way.
  • Thank you for employment, my co-workers and my cherished customers and business partners who are my extended family.
  • Thank you for a good home, good health and a full belly.
  • Thank for my faith; for Your Son and for my community of believers.
  • And thanks for the shitty stuff, too. It makes the good stuff somehow seem even better.
  • And thank you God for all the many blessings that I take for granted each day.

My wish is for each of you to have a beautiful Thanksgiving and a moment to reflect on all of your blessings, too.

Peace,
Denis

Yo Quiero Mexico!

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Last week I was in Mexico City and Guadalajara on business.  In two weeks I’ll be back in Mexico City – that will be my 5th or 6th trip to Mexico this year.  Even though it’s business travel I’ve come to have a fondness for Mexico and the Mexican people who I have encountered.  Now to be fair I’m the customer or guest in all these encounters so I guess that I likely don’t have a realistic view of life in Mexico – just what “my handlers” want me to see.  But I’ve been well handled.

Laguna de Chapala near Guadalajara

While everyone at home has been telling me to “be careful” in Mexico and to avoid travel there; that hasn’t really been an option for me.  Others in my company have backed out of travel “south of the border” for various and assorted reasons but I suspect fear or ignorance or a combination of both.  I’m not so naive to believe that there is no danger in Mexico right now.  But my experience has been no different from when I travel to any major city or unknown destination – exercise caution and employ common sense.  Also I don’t knowingly associate with drug dealers or any other sketchy characters.  And I don’t make myself a target by hanging around in less than desirable locales. 

The professionals that I have dealt with are well traveled, intelligent, thoughtful individuals.  Their hospitality and consideration toward me has been overwhelming.  Again, as I stated before, I am their customer so I would expect some deference.  But the way that I have been treated is much more than the standard customer service to which I have become accustomed.  So while travel to Mexico is slightly challenging (long lines in customs, language barriers, cultural confusion), the plus side is that I have met some wonderful people who love their country and are proud to be Mexicans.  In addition they have treated me as a welcome guest instead of an annoying outsider. 

A company that I am working with is owned by one family.  The patriarch is named Edmundo as well as his son Edmundo Junior.  They work with their nephew/cousin also named Edmundo.  Both of the junior Edmundos each have sons named Edmundo as well.  One family building and sharing a successful business together is remarkable in and of itself.  The fact that they have employees that have been with them for over 30 and 40 years is a testament to the company and the extraordinary leadership and loyalty of the Edmundos.

I look forward to my next trip and my continued association with my new friends.  For me Mexico was once little more than a vacation destination.  Now I realize that is a splendid country which is home for some truly remarkable people.  And I thank God for letting my world get just a little bit smaller. 

“For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, a stranger and you welcomed me.” Matthew 25:35

Gracias,

Denis

New Life

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This coming Saturday our grandson Noah will be baptized.  This past Saturday my niece Caprice was married.  Last week I participated in a Mass of Remembrance for those that died in our parish.

What do these three things have in common?  They are all a celebration of new life.  New Life in Christ.

It occurred to me at my niece’s wedding that with new life there is joy and excitement but there is also some uncertainty and a need for adjustment.  This is true with Baptism, Marriage and death. 

In Baptism we celebrate being “reborn” in Christ.  But as Catholic Christians it doesn’t end with the Sacrament.  It is the beginning of our life as a disciple of Christ.  Noah will be presented for Baptism as an infant but his parents will bear the responsibility for his formation.  The community will support their efforts in raising him as a Christian but ultimately Noah will choose to accept his faith as an adult.  We will all embrace the joys and sorrows that he will encounter as we ask God to walk with him but it will be Noah’s life to live.  His life’s journey is unknown at this time but our belief in Jesus’ saving grace is certain and will sustain him forever. 

In marriage the Sacrament is also just the beginning.  Caprice and Jimmy have witnessed their love before their community and committed themselves to Christ in their marriage ceremony.  But now the “heavy lifting” begins.  They have the rest of lives to affirm their love for one another.  They will witness to all those who know and love them.  And because they have invited Jesus into their married life they now have confidence in that sacred bond.

As Christians we believe in life after death.  Again the Sacrament of the Anointing is just the beginning. It is often administered immediately before death and a Christian burial.  The Sacrament signifies a beginning of our journey from death to life.  As Catholics we believe in a period of purgation after our death.  You can think of it as a time when “your life flashes before your eyes”.  We can’t (and shouldn’t) quantify it but as humans we are inclined to try.  It is enough to believe that it is a period of adjustment when we are finally able to let go of our human existence and accept eternal life with Christ.  And maybe that’s the scary part.  Eternity is a long time.  I take comfort in knowing that God created us to love us.  So life in heaven with Him can only be a good thing.

Holding heaven in my arms

On Saturday when Noah is being held in his mother’s arms and the waters of Baptism are being poured over him I will be imagining that heaven must be like that.  Being held in my Creator’s arms and having new life poured over me.  What a beautiful image.  And Noah will be witnessing to us what heaven can be for those who love God.

Peace,

Denis

Water

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I love to travel.  I like to see new places and experience different cultures. I’ve been blessed with a job that allows me to travel.  I’ve been from ‘sea to shining sea’ here in the United States.  Plus our son lived in Germany for five years so we’ve had opportunities to travel to Europe a few times for pleasure, too.  This year I’ve been to China and Mexico and I’m planning to travel to Spain early next spring.  In two weeks I’ll be in Mexico City again and then on to Guadalajara.  The following week I’ll be in New York City.  All this travel feeds my soul.  I encounter culture and diversity with each trip.  And I gain an appreciation for the world outside of ‘my little universe’. 

Some of my favorite memories are those made while traveling.  Three years ago we were in London for Thanksgiving.  Our whole family made the trip – our sons, our daughter, our daughter-in-law, our son-in-law and our granddaughter Charlise (Anna was “in utero”) and Noah wasn’t even a glint in his Daddy’s eye at the time.  Eight people traveling together from Germany to London and back to Germany with one of them being a three year old presents some logistical challenges but we had a fantastic time.  The British Museum, Parliament, The Tower of London, and Buckingham Palace were among the highlights of our trip.  But for me one thing stands out and will remain as one of the most precious memories of my life. 

We toured Westminster Abbey.  For those of you that have been there or read about it, you know that this place is steeped in history.  I could have spent days there.  As it was, we spent several hours and all the while three year old Charlise was in her stroller and very content.  Now as amazing as the history of the place was for the adults you can imagine that from a three year old’s perspective it might have been dull – but she was an angel the entire time.  Parliament, Westminster Abbey and the River Thames are all within walking distance of one another so after we finally left the Abbey we decided to walk across the Thames.  I was pushing Charlise’s stroller and I could hear her speaking very excitedly.  I stopped; walked around the front of her stroller and bent down to ask her what it was that she wanted.  Her response: “Look Pawpaw, water!”  After spending hours in Westminster Abbey where her point of reference was everyone’s kneecaps (or rear-ends); she finally saw something that she could recognize – WATER. 

WATER!  How beautiful.  How simple.  How wonderful.  Charlise and I shared that moment for what seemed like a very long time.  We looked at the water together and for that special moment in time I felt like a three year old again.  It was exciting and I realized then and there that ancient artifacts and significant historical places (no matter how important) could never take the place of my granddaughter’s enthusiasm for that moment.  It was truly a ‘take time to smell the roses’ experience. 

So while I returned home with great souvenirs and great photos and great memories of majestic places, the one thing I will always treasure most is the time when Charlise and I looked at the water in The Thames.  You know, it could have been a creek at home but it doesn’t matter.  Because we were ‘in the moment’ and we saw WATER together! 

Try to find something that a three year old might appreciate.  And then indulge yourself.  You’ll be amazed at how beautiful the world is from that point of view. 

“Let the children come to me; do not prevent them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.” Mark 10:14

Peace,

Denis

Pets, Peeves, and Pet Peeves

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Pets:  My wife has two dogs.  A retarded (sorry – developmentally disabled) Maltese named Sophie and a Yorkshire terrier (terrorist) named Lulu.  I hate these dogs.  No wait – that’s not fair – hate is not a strong enough word.  Sophie the Maltese likes to run away on occasion – Run Sophie, run!  Where do you think that you’re going?  Would anyone else put up with you?  Doubtful.  Your only redeeming quality is that you are pitiful and you make others feel better about themselves by comparison.  Even the birds and rabbits in our backyard mock you. “Try to catch me, stupid dog”, they seem to taunt.  Lulu the terrorist likes to bark at me when I leave home EVERY MORNING.  Sort of like “get out of here!” or “never come back!”  Really Lulu???  Like I don’t despise you enough already.  Okay, the dogs do give Deb some company when I travel and when I had surgery last year Sophie laid by my side for days while I recovered.  And of course our granddaughters LOVE the dogs.  So as long as Charlise and Anna love them I guess they can remain.  But there are days…   I know that this makes me a DOG HATER and puts me in the same category as people like Hitler and Dick Cheney but I can live with that.

Peeves:  I try to keep my anger in check but sometimes it just sort of ‘bubbles over’.  This is an extremely busy time of year for our business – trying to get everything installed in stores before the Christmas retail push (thank God for the commercialization of Christ’s birth!).  Folks in the office are a little frantic and nerves are on edge so EVERYONE needs to take a collective deep breath and calm the hell down. No one is going to die if a shipment or installation is missed.  I repeat – NO ONE IS GOING TO DIE.  However someone might get fired.  Today I would like to fire nearly everyone that has crossed my path – it’s just one of those days.  Why is it that when things get busy; people get stupider – see even me (I know that stupider is not a word)?  Today we’re having a little ‘Pizza Party’ here in the office and even that is annoying me – please stop asking me if I will attend!  Of course I won’t – I will take my pizza into my office and eat alone.  Trust me you will all be happier that way.  Now get back to work!  We can’t miss any shipments or installs!

Pet Peeves: The following in no particular order is a list of some of my major pet peeves –

  • People who drive S L O W in the passing lane
  • Infomercials
  • Paid Political Advertisements
  • The hillbillies that live next door (and their barking dog)
  • People who invade my personal space
  • Brett Favre, Michael Vick, and Manny Ramirez – yuck!
  • The way the old creepy guy at the gym walks around naked in the locker room
  • Text speak – OMG LMAO
  • People (usually old) at the airport security checkpoint who hold up the line
  • Junk mail
  • Stupid made-up holidays like ‘Bosses Day’ or ‘Administrative Assistants Day’
  • Crap that’s left under my windshield wiper on a parking lot
  • Cranky old men
  • People who ALWAYS need to be the center of attention
  • People who can’t stop complaining about stuff

Wait a minute; those last three kind of sound like me…

I guess I should  just go home and pet our dogs – then EVERYTHING will be better.  Oh no, I’m worse off than I thought!

Peace,

Denis

Acting Like A Two Year Old

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Most Sundays my two year old granddaughter Anna is usually her wiggly-giggly self at Mass.  It’s not that she’s bad (in fact I find her immensely entertaining much to the dismay of her parents).  It’s just that she’s two!  She “reads” her books out loud.  Which means that she has memorized them and recites what she knows.  She just doesn’t use her ‘church voice’; she “reads” them OUT LOUD.  And she loves to climb on the kneelers; hang from the hymnal holder; and sometimes belly crawl under the pew in front of us.  Again – she’s only two.  And she’s adorable!  It’s not that she’s really that disruptive but she (we) gets looks of disapproval from her parents and sometimes even threats of THE DREADED TIME-OUT.  Depending on the celebrant, sometimes Mass seems like a ‘time-out’ to me anyway, but I digress…

This past Sunday Anna was especially “entertaining” and at one point I thought for sure she (we) was headed for a scolding.  But things calmed down and she (we) behaved herself. 

And then the most incredible thing happened.  Her one month old baby brother Noah let out the tiniest little squeak.  Not really a cry but more of chirp.  Anna bolted upright in the pew and asked, “Why is Daddy not taking Noah out to the car?”

Really???  Little Miss ‘Ants in Your Pants’, you’re questioning why Noah is not being removed from the building?  We all had to laugh at that!  And of course why wouldn’t she question it?  In her mind Noah was crying and should have to go to the car – period.  Her previous silliness was not the issue.

Later reflecting on what had happened at Mass it occurred to me that I frequently ‘act like a two year old’ myself.  Often I think that someone else should be dealt with severely for some offense or indiscretion.  If I was guilty of the same thing I would expect tolerance or understanding but if another were found culpable I would want justice – my idea of justice anyway.  It’s easy to fall into that trap.  I want someone else to pay for their sins but when it’s me then maybe what I did wasn’t so bad after all.  There’s that ‘two year old’ mentality. 

Noah - an angel without wings

I’m praying about this.  And with God’s help I’m going to try (again) to be more understanding of others.  I’m going to try (again) to be more tolerant of others.  I’m going to try (again) to be more forgiving of others.  And maybe when I’m the guilty one perhaps then I will deserve some understanding, tolerance, and forgiveness, too. 

In the meantime, I just hope that Noah doesn’t ‘act up’ in church any more.  Anna and I expect better of him.

Peace,

Denis

Spanglish

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Cuidad de Mexico

This year I’ve done quite a bit of work in Mexico City and Cancun.  And this winter we will be manufacturing, shipping and installing wall cases, racks, tables, mannequin platforms and other store fixtures for an additional 160 shops in Mexico.  Retail business is booming in Mexico.  Apparently when drug lords aren’t killing elected officials, one another or the occasional passerby they like to shop – who knew?

In addition to the work in Mexico, in early spring, I have another 120 shops scheduled for Spain. So I need to learn how to speak Spanish soon – well I would like to learn how to speak Spanish soon.  Here is my dilemma: I never got higher than a “C+” in high school Spanish and my current mastery of the language is limited to ordering a beer (una cerveza por favor) or asking for a bathroom (Donde esta el bano?)

Recently I purchased Rosetta Stone® with the hope of learning Spanish quickly.  I am learning but NOT QUICKLY.  Rosetta Stone’s whole premise is that it teaches you to speak a foreign language the way you learned how to speak your native language.  I think I was at least two years old before I could speak English, so I probably won’t be fluent in Espanol by January.

My written Spanish is poor at best and my reading ability is very limited.  But the hardest part is my understanding of native Spanish speakers!  Oh for the love of God -PLEASE SLOW DOWN!

Now I’ve been following Rosetta Stone’s lessons and I guess I’m making some progress but I have a meeting in Mexico City in about three weeks so I guess I’ll just be ordering beers and asking to use the bathroom a lot while I’m down there.

Someone suggested that I watch novelas on Univision® – they’re like soap operas but ‘las mujeres son muy sexy’!  I guess maybe you can teach an old ‘perro’ some new tricks!

Paz,

Denis

Speak My Mind(?)

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I feel like I’ve spent most of my life trying to be understood.  I am the youngest of three boys and my parents were probably just exhausted by the time I arrived on the scene.  So as long as I wasn’t crying I guess that everyone assumed I was just fine.  And the kind of attention that my brother Dean was getting (spankings and lectures) wasn’t really what I was looking for anyway.  So I learned to be quiet and ‘fly under the radar’.  Not always a bad idea.  But it’s hard to get your point across when you’re silent.

I remember raising my hand in class (until my arm was tired) at Saint Peter Elementary School, oh so many years ago, and rarely being called on.  I guess I wasn’t very good at getting the teachers’ attention either.  It really wasn’t until high school that I got much notice at school and it usually wasn’t the ‘good kind’.  It’s not that I didn’t have friends; I just wasn’t that interesting.  But when given the opportunity, I could speak articulately and most often get my point across.  I just needed (waited for) permission to speak. 

That has all changed.  And to me it seems like it was gradual but Deb thinks that I have ALWAYS spoken my mind and that I have ALWAYS made my point (I believe beat a dead horse is the expression that she uses).  But I know that it was her love and respect and approval that helped me to become the man that I am today.  She has given me confidence because she has listened to me when others didn’t (wouldn’t).  And she is the kindest of critics – gently suggesting that I might be wrong about some things (as if…).  And teaching me that you can be right and still not always be able to ‘get your point across’ if you are bombastic and obnoxious about it.  She has this innate ability to ‘win people over’.  It’s called gentle persuasion.  Unfortunately patience is required and I often lack that precious commodity.  Still I have learned from her and now I can state an opinion without alienating everyone in the room usually. Well maybe only sometimes. 

Debbie lives with the credo that “one should never discuss politics or religion” in social settings.  That doesn’t leave me much to talk about because those are my two favorite topics (after my grandchildren, of course).  So I often struggle through ‘polite conversation’ at dinner parties and such.  I’m certain that at times I appear aloof or bored but actually I’m just trying not to “speak my mind”.  I’ve literally bitten my tongue to keep from telling someone that they were completely asinine (my opinion) about something or other.  When I do try to make a point without using abusive language or questioning someone’s parentage I usually sound pretty unconvincing – so often I revert to my childhood inclination to remain silent.  I guess its enough to just know that I’m right and they’re wrong.  But at times I would like to “tell it like it is” however, trying to educate the entire world is just too much work.  And besides when someone asks for your opinion it seems to me that they really only want to hear what they believe anyway.

I’m a little anxious these days – with mid-term elections and the conservative back-lash in the Catholic Church I often feel alone in the wilderness.  Yet from time to time I need to “speak my mind”. 

So here goes: 

  • I think that our country is better off today with President Obama than we were with President Bush.  And I will work for his re-election in 2012. 
  • I believe that the policy of “Don’t Ask – Don’t Tell” is wrong and should be repealed. 
  • I support marriage for gays and lesbians. 
  • I am pro-life BUT that means ALL LIFE: not just unborn babies – capital punishment should be abolished. 
  • I am in favor of women’s ordination in the Catholic Church. 
  • I believe that the Catholic Church should have a married clergy as well – this is what I pray for when asked to pray for vocations. 
  • Oh, and those Tea Party Candidates scare the beejeezus out of me! 

But the next time I’m at a dinner party I’ll likely stick to talking about sports and the weather and my grandkids.  After that I’ll probably just look bored…

Peace,

Denis