We’re having a heat wave in Saint Louis right now. Triple digit temperatures with heat indexes nearing 120 degrees. When people complain about the heat around here, you often hear other people say, “It’s not the heat; it’s the humidity”. We actually make excuses for the weather – like somehow the heat doesn’t mean to be so hot; “if it just weren’t for that darn humidity!”
How often do we all make excuses (or allowances) for other people’s bad behavior or bad manners or bad mood? I used to make excuses for my kids all the time – “he’s tired” or “she didn’t mean to…” or “he’s just being a boy”. And we make excuses for bad adult behavior, too – “everybody knows not to talk to her before she’s had her coffee”. Often women will make excuses for their husbands – “he doesn’t know how to do anything around the house”. REALLY? Doesn’t know or doesn’t want to know?
My point is that we seldom hold people accountable for their actions. If someone behaves badly there MUST be a reason – something is beyond their control. Or maybe if I really took the time to figure out what was bothering them, then I could help. Or perhaps I just misunderstood what they said or did, etc., etc. I have a friend that CONSTANTLY makes allowances for everyone. She has such a good heart and is so trusting that she always believes in the goodness of others. I used to joke that in High School she was probably voted ‘Most Likely to Date a Serial Killer’. She shames me with her kindness!
Now I know that I tend to be a little cynical at times and I might sometimes jump to the conclusion that someone is just being a lout. But really, I think that sometimes some people are just being a–holes. I don’t know; maybe they just like being jerks. But I for one refuse to accept boorish behavior. Sadness, grief, pain, heartache – okay. Simply being bombastic because you can? Take it somewhere else!
Starting today, I am going on notice that I will no longer tolerate, accommodate, or otherwise make excuses for ANYONE that can’t be civil or won’t grow up and deal with their own issues. IT IS THE HEAT AND THE HUMIDITY! DEAL WITH IT!
Sorry for the rant but this heat has really taken a toll on me. I usually don’t go on like this…
Peace,
Denis